The world is impatient, spiteful, and unfair towards individuals with limited or low social skills. Those who haven’t developed these skills are left vulnerable to harsh societal scrutiny. The very concept of “social skills” is overvalued and frequently wielded as an insult rather than a positive attribute. Online, keyboard warriors often dismiss justified frustrations about societal expectations by claiming, “Maybe you just have bad social skills.” This occurs, for example, when someone is unsuccessful at job interviews, dating, or maintaining friendships. It’s crucial to recognise that such accusations frequently originate from the just-world fallacy—a deeply distorted way of viewing the probability of success.
Implicitly, these bullies believe there must always be a “fair” reason for rejection, bullying, or ostracism. Let’s briefly take a look at job interviews. Fallacious minds that fall victim to the idea of a just-world overlook the superficial nature of job interviews, such as the potential for trick questioning by interviewers, being liked based on the flattering charisma of the interviewee, and the employer’s search for specific personality traits that do not reflect true skill-based competence. Nepotism and cronyism fit this bill too. The issue isn’t always a lack of—so-called—social skills. This emphasis on social skills contributes to the idea that bullies are justified, from the playground to the workplace.
Human callousness cannot be ignored. Individuals often enjoy witnessing or contributing to the misfortunes of others, especially those perceived as weaker or different. It is social competition in action. Society is a cruel arena where only the socially adept thrive, while others are left to fend for themselves or become targets of ridicule.
Hypocrisy and self-preservation are rampant. Those who claim to be tolerant and inclusive quickly ostracise or mock those with social challenges when it suits their interests or ego. People with limited social skills are often seen as easy targets for manipulation and exploitation, with few consequences for their abusers. These abusers are more emotionally intelligent and can expertly take advantage of others. The relentless pressure to conform to specific social norms creates a hostile environment for those who deviate, reinforcing the notion of a triangular order of superiority in the social hierarchy. While it’s possible to be eccentric, authentic, and socially skilled, conformists often confuse these qualities with a lack of social awareness. This is a mere cop-out. When they see an eccentric person with self-confidence, they often despise them for challenging the social conventions they believe hold authority.
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